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Slanty Olympics
02:27
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You shouldn’t have confronted me in the pantry
because it’s New Year’s 2, and I’m angry.
You should’ve known the Slanty had eaten my wallet
and I would say some things that I didn’t mean.
But I like the way your fingers move to
make the piano stick off my bass notes,
and I feel when your already there when you say,
“Woo! It’s time for the Slanty Olympics!”
Then the whispers preclude the room; they enter saying,
“Let's HB the C in the Y near the river!”
I hunker down to spoil the mood by saying,
“the River’s god is the ocean.
The River’s god is the ocean:
doubting the existence as we sometimes do.
The jagged rocks scrape along its belly,
whispering obscenities as it passes through.
Then the smartass trout asks a question:
“why do you seek the Ocean, are you alone?”
“We are many; we die in droves,” the River replies in a monotone.
The trout gets a beacon, and pauses to think –
a familiar flash of something new.
McPherson’s brook, a worthy cause!
– becoming aware of what to do.
I turn around and I’m all alone;
I couldn’t find the humour in a kicked in door.
I turn around and the house is alive
like a hundred years of history throwing up for the first time.
I like the way your fingers move
to make the piano stick off my bass notes,
and I feel when you all ready there.
You say, “Woo! It’s time for the Slanty Olympics!”
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Joe Ross Fredericton, New Brunswick
Joe Ross released an EP in 2003, played in Fredericton, and then became a teacher.
After an extended
hiatus, he started playing again in 2018. Five years later, despite the brief interruption of 2020, Grid City's Matt Carter wrote, "Joe Ross has maintained a consistent presence on local stages" (2023).
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